Living with incurable lung cancer
‘1 in 2 people will develop some form of cancer during their lifetime’ – it’s an all too familiar statistic, but one you never think will happen to you, not least in your early 30s.
In July I found a lump in my armpit. I had it checked and a few weeks later a CT scan confirmed incurable lung cancer.
I found myself grieving for the future I thought we were all going to have…
I was in shock, it had come out of nowhere and all I could think about were my two precious little boys (4 and 2 years old) and that I wouldn’t get to see them grow up, nor would I grow old with my husband.
In the following weeks I found myself grieving for the future I thought we were all going to have, anxiously waiting to find out what my treatment options would be and coming to terms with my diagnosis. It felt like an imminent death sentence with no hope.
My husband and I knew we couldn’t face this journey on our own, especially in those first few weeks when we were mentally exhausted. We’ve been so grateful to our church family and for all the encouragement and prayer provided since my diagnosis. We’ve felt surrounded by love and support, and God has certainly given us the peace and strength to get through each day.
My motto has been ‘one day at a time’, inspired from the Bible verse Matthew 6:34…
I’m naturally an anxious person and so it has been very humbling to have no control over my treatment and prognosis but instead to hand it over to God and trust His plan for me.
My motto has been ‘one day at a time’, inspired from the Bible verse Matthew 6:34, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
It has helped me to not let the worries of tomorrow take away from the joys of today; especially whilst my treatment is giving me more time with my family so that we can make memories and I can see my beautiful boys reach some special milestones.
In contrast to how I initially felt, the last few months have been a huge reminder that actually there is hope, and so much of it. I’m glad that my hope and trust is in Jesus, who was born over 2000 years ago (something I am even more excited to celebrate this Christmas)!
Jesus being born changes everything for me and for those who trust and believe in him because he lived a perfect life, free of sin. He died so that we can be saved and have eternal life and a personal relationship with God. Knowing this truth gives me hope for my future!
… I am trusting this unknown future to a known, loving God.
It’s scary to think what my diagnosis would look like without Jesus, but I’m grateful to know that he is with me through it all.
I don’t know exactly what lies ahead, but I know that I am trusting this unknown future to a known, loving God.